Introduction

"Blog." It is a fucking stupid word. And it has been since I have first heard it.

It's allegedly short for "weblog," but nobody actually calls them that. So it's not really a nickname, more of a catchy, hip, and undeniably goofy sounding slang term.

And while I could insist that this, my own "blog," be referred to by a different name (I considered calling it a "Rantjournal" or a "Blahg"), the fact that I am hosted by a site called "blogger" makes denying it rather pointless.

So yes, it is a blog. I accept that. But that doesn't mean it has to fall into the same set of cliches that the rest of the online journal community seems trapped in.

A list of things that this blog will not be:

1. A means for me to vent specifics about my personal life. Because I don't really understand the point. If I want to share my personal crises with people I know, I'll try "talking" to them. Or if that fails, I'll use my "telephone." Talking about your life through a medium where strangers can observe is like going to the bathroom in public - only a person with a serious fecal fetish would enjoy it.

2. A means for me to make vague innuendoes about my personal life. You know - while relating an insignificant story from my day, I oh-so-cleverly hide several references that only one person will understand is in reference to my undying love for them. Or undying hate, or whatever. You fill in the blank. There will be none of that here. If I'm going to try to be clever, I might as well do it in a way so that *everyone* is going to notice.

3. A place for me to rant about political situations which I only know about because I read it on some other blog. I actually plan to steer clear of politics in general, unless I really think I have something to add. There are enough "I hate Bush, etc." sites around, and it would be pretty arrogant of me to think that I could really change anything by taking my own site in that direction.

4. A means to share those HILARIOUS "what Lord Of The Rings character are you?" type quizzes. Those things (and all variations on them) are without a doubt the biggest waste of internet time I have ever run across, excepting myspace and friendster. Most of the questions on them are so specific (for example: "are you a dwarf? yes/no?") that anyone taking it can predict pretty easily what the outcome will be. And besides - if I want to pretend I am a dwarf, then I will take up Dungeons and Dragons. Pretending to be one online just reeks of kinkiness.

5. A place for me to post poetry, or short stories, or song lyrics, or what have you. I'm not that emo. Not yet at least.

So what do I plan on doing with this space? Making observations, ranting, writing funny things that come into my head. Essays on hip-hop, Shibuya-Kei, Los Angeles, movies I have seen, Asimov's "Foundation" trilogy - are just a few of the things I have in store. Things that run through my head which I think other people might also be able to get some enjoyment out of. In short: all of the good things a blog can be used for, without all of the self-indulgent crap that so frequently goes along with it.

At least, that's what I'm shooting for. There is a chance that within a month, I'll be ranting about some stupid happening in my life, or (god forbid) referring to important people in my life by their first initial, or (shoot me before this happens) finding out which Final Fantasy VII character is most like me. If I go that far, I urge anyone reading this to have this blog shut down A.S.A.P. Claim that I showed you kiddie porn, or something. Get me arrested, so I can no longer use this stupid thing. At that point, I will be beyond hope.

In fact, I probably deserve to have that happen, just for using the term "blog." I guess I am doomed...